Corrupt-a-wish.

Granted. The government wipes your memories and traps you in an experimental Lotus-Eater Machine, where you get all the free time you want. Just don't ask why there aren't any roads out of town...

---

I wish Donald Trump would be forced to play Undertale.

Undertale gets a huge influx of Trump supporting fans. Make the Underground Great Again becomes a new slogan.

I wish for a trainside job.

Granted. On your first day you get hit by a train.

I wish the world was more accepting of autistic people.

Granted. There is still a loud vocal minority of people who want to exterminate everyone with autism. Sadly they end up rising to power.

I wish I had a personal water fountain to drink from.

"Why do Hisuian Lilligant become extinct in the future? That kind of scares me..." - Hisuian Lilligant

Granted. Unfortunately, it tastes like rust.

I wish people would stop whining about changes in video game remakes.

Oh no! The DREADED AQUAE MORTIS! No, wait, it's just your imagination.

Granted, they fawn over them instead, at the cost of all else

I wish governments were never corrupt

Granted. Governments are now Crimson.

I wish I would have a good night's sleep tonight and wake up at a reasonable hour.

Granted. But as you fall asleep, your nightmares are disturbingly horrific and vivid. They realize all of your worst fears. When you wake up at Seven the next morning, you feel well-rested, yet traumatized for the rest of the week by the dream.

I wish I was ambidextrous.

Everybody loves the me! I’m a great athlete!

Granted. Your dexterity with your dominant hand drops down to that of your non-dominant hand. Now you're equally-incompetent with both of them.

I wish for a bowl of really good salsa.

Bigotry will NEVER be welcome on TV Tropes.

Granted. It's made out of human blood.

I wish it wasn't raining so hard.

"Why do Hisuian Lilligant become extinct in the future? That kind of scares me..." - Hisuian Lilligant

Granted, there's now one less raindrop per minute

I wish I was better at chess

Granted. You're so skilled at chess that it becomes boring, and you can never enjoy it again.

---

I wish I could imitate voices.

Granted, however you can no longer use your own voice and must only speak with the voices of others. Inspired by the Kenku race in Dn D

---

I wish that my Steam Deck had infinite storage while still being playable so I don't have to sacrifice which games to keep on it at any given time.

"What does freedom really mean when demanded of you by a god?"

Granted, to do that however would need infinitely large part, so you destroyed the universe great job dingus

I wish to be able to give others nightmares on command

Granted. Those that you have given nightmares will also share your power with you, and there's a possibly something karmic would happen to you.

I wish that the minifigures in my Lego playset were sentient, and functioned like a full-blown society.

Now that's what I call good cop, bad cop.

Granted, they create a nuclear bomb that blows up your street.

I wish steak was more affordable.

Edited by The_Dag on May 6th 2024 at 1:13:19 PM

Mankind is unloveable. No more kindness!

Granted. This comes at the cost of everything else having their price skyrocket.

I wish I woke up early today.

"Why do Hisuian Lilligant become extinct in the future? That kind of scares me..." - Hisuian Lilligant

Granted. You woke up 2 seconds earlier today, and if you were late for something before you still are now

I wish I could rule the world without ever being deposed

Granted. You aren't deposed, but the Reaper removes you from your position instead. Can't stop the train to the underworld.

---

I wish to find a hard drive or two that contains all of my worldbuilding as various forms of completed media. Give me my Perihelion anime!

"Oh, I'm a paramedic, not a fightymedic. That's Caduceus' job."

Granted, all are So Bad, It's Horrible.

I wish to conquer OCD.

Edited by The_Dag on May 6th 2024 at 12:15:23 PM

Mankind is unloveable. No more kindness!

Granted. You are now the head of the Louisiana Office of Cultural Development. Hey, you never specified which OCD you wanted to conquer.

---

I wish I could walk on clouds.

Edited by GoosefromWikipedia on May 16th 2024 at 4:44:44 AM

Granted. You can now only walk on clouds.

I wish that there were an official 3.x conversion of Al-Qadim/Arabian Adventures.

Oh no! The DREADED AQUAE MORTIS! No, wait, it's just your imagination.

Granted. It's unspeakably buggy and horrible.

I wish my family and I didn't spend the entire day in an area without cell phone signal.

"Why do Hisuian Lilligant become extinct in the future? That kind of scares me..." - Hisuian Lilligant

granted. now your phone just straight up doesn't have signal anymore! no SIM, no phone number, nothing.

---

i wish Splatoon 3 got a content extension

Think we're ready for that next floor, Eight.

Granted. Not only is it a buggy, untouchable mess, but when updating the game to include it there’s a 50% chance it sets the console on fire. Oh, and there’s a lot of Character Derailment too, just to rub salt in the wound.

I wish I was a world famous pop star.

Everybody loves the me! I’m a great athlete!