He traumatizes children and demolishes the booth.
Don't Try It
Numbnuts decided to give live munitions to the kiddies.
It's Over Anakin, I have the high ground!
bored
It goes great,she`s sweet and the kids love her.
One just might
Gets angry when a kid hates the Darth Vader toy he gives them, slashes all decorations before leaving angrily.
edited 24th Jul '16 7:37:14 PM by Blurring
If a chicken crosses the road and nobody else is around to see it, does the road move beneath the chicken instead?
Stark flaunts his money to get the kids what they want, while Cap lends them emotional support.
It's a Mall Santa off.
Jer gets all the girls
He gets pretty into it, and loves talking to the kids. He did, however, put on the costume over his armour, which kinda breaks the illusion.
Everybody's all "Jerry's old and feeble" till they see him run down a skyscraper and hijack a helicopter mid-flight.
Red Like Santa
He doesn't need an outfit. He can just transform. And he'll really enjoy it.
Now known as Cyber Controller
Divine Burden
The kids would certainly enjoy the experience. Ruby's a nice girl.
Fallout 2? More like Fallout 2 bad.
Darkseid manages to scare kids, and threaten the world with coal! And his Omega Beams.
Luckily, Superman's chum, Clark Kent was around, and soon, Darkseid was restrained!
edited 25th Jul '16 4:43:07 AM by RandomWriter413
see you, space cowboy.
I'm almost positive Caboose would fuck it up somehow. He would give a kid a miniature nuke or something.
At least his heart is in the right place.
Long live the New Bev.
Gordon would hate the job, and the kids would hate his unenthusiastic, cynical performance.
He's such an adorable little menace. Even his damage sound is cute. "Pooks!"
Don't Try It
Freddy will suffer a malfunction, and his creepyness made a lot of kids cry.
It's Over Anakin, I have the high ground!
PINNACLE OF MAN
Medic will seem nice and quirky at first, until he makes kids cry by telling them the stories of experiments on his teammates.
I am the most suitable partner for Gaia. I have some bad news. You will not make it to Eden. This is the end of your journey.
Fired within hours for scaring the children.
edited 30th Jul '16 1:06:09 PM by PhysicalStamina
It's one thing to make a spectacle. It's another to make a difference.He certainly looks the part, but he'd probably be terrible at it and get fired quickly.
He's such an adorable little menace. Even his damage sound is cute. "Pooks!"
Don't Try It
The costume scared a lot of the kiddies, that's before he opens his mouth.
It's Over Anakin, I have the high ground!
PINNACLE OF MAN
His gloominess, awful accent, and insistence on referring to himself as "Mall Ded Moroz" gets him fired. He mentions that it was much better being a mercenary, and silently insults his manager by swearing in Russian.
I am the most suitable partner for Gaia. I have some bad news. You will not make it to Eden. This is the end of your journey.He takes his job way too seriously. The children find him boring.
He's such an adorable little menace. Even his damage sound is cute. "Pooks!"
see you, space cowboy.
He is the best goddamn mall santa in history, but everyone's freaked out because he has no skin.
Long live the New Bev.
Jer gets all the girls
The children scream and run
Everybody's all "Jerry's old and feeble" till they see him run down a skyscraper and hijack a helicopter mid-flight.
He does a fair job, but uses his stretching powers to ever so subtly pickpocket the kids's parents when he thinks no one's looking. Bonus points if said parents happen to be rich.
edited 3rd Nov '16 4:14:34 AM by IchigoMontoya
Dread Pirate Captain
Children will flood the mall, wanting to see "Thunder Santa".
Don't stop, just proceed, 'cause this is what you need-proceed, just proceed, 'cause this is what you need!
Don't Try It
Scout would only accept the kids with single moms. Sonic would take as many breaks as he can to scarf down on some chilly dogs. Tracer would be the most competent of the three, but she is too cheery.
It's Over Anakin, I have the high ground!
If he's still in the tub, there's plenty of lawsuits.
(Yes, even if the avatar is a girl.) How does it turn out, for the avatar and for the kids (s)he talks to?
He's such an adorable little menace. Even his damage sound is cute. "Pooks!"